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Underbox: Eleven
© 2021 by Walter Reimer
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Capt. Horatio Hortense Bezoar
“Well! Look what the cat’s dragged in,” Karin said, grinning at her husband as Hamo entered their apartment. The table was set for dinner. “You’re home early,” she said after the two shared a kiss. “Any trouble?”
Hamo shook their head. “None whatever, and I stayed out of trouble.”
“Really?”
The cross-fox rolled their eyes. “I spent an hour at the clinic to make sure, darling.”
“Good,” the red fox said with mock severity. She then grinned and tousled her husband’s red-streaked gray headfur. “Margot’s out with Rainer and Anna and their kids for a play date, but they’ll be back in about an hour. Time for you to get cleaned up.”
“I took a shower this morning – “
“That was this morning, and you’re still in your work clothes. So get cleaned up for dinner. Shoo!”
Chuckling, Hamo said, “Yes, dear,” and headed for the bedroom.
By the time Margot shouted “Daddy!” and ran away from Anna to jump into her father’s paws, Hamo had taken their second shower and was now dressed in shorts and a t-shirt that bore a bizarre drawing of a World War tank with a legend in Fraktur that read Grinding My Gears.
The cross-fox scooped their giggling daughter up and Margot pointed at the shirt. “Tank!”
She giggled again as Hamo nuzzled the little vixen. “Yes, it’s a tank. Thanks, Anna, for you and Rainer taking her out for the day. Was she any trouble?” They nuzzled Margot again. “Were you any trouble, you naughty girl?” and the kit giggled again.
Anna and Rainer were both feline, with two children. Anna laughed and replied, “No, Hamo, she was a perfect angel all day – “
“That usually means she ran you both ragged,” Karin put in.
Rainer chuckled as he ran a paw over his son’s head. “Not as bad as Vanya here was, when he was two.” He raised his muzzle and sniffed. “That smells great.”
“Pizza,” Karin replied. “Would you two like to stay for dinner?”
“Oh, we wouldn’t want to impose – “
“Nonsense, there’s enough for everybody. Hamo?” Karin asked, and when they looked up at their wife she said, “Go get Margot ready for dinner.”
“Sure.” Rainer gathered up his two children, and the two fathers trooped off to the bathroom.
Anna insisted on helping reset the table. “Hamo does such a great job with Margot. Is it because - ?” Karin nodded, and the feline femme smiled.
By the time the two fathers had the children washed up and ready, Karin had taken the pizza from the oven, and the air was filled with the aroma of the meat and vegetables that the crust ed. The children had milk or soda, while Hamo opened a bottle of red wine for the adults.
There had been enough, just barely, and Anna helped Karin look after the children as Rainer and Hamo cleared the table. Afterwards, they chatted about the day as the children played in the middle of the living room floor.
Rainer took a sip of his wine. He was limiting himself to one, he’d said. Lowering the glass the gray tabby said, “Heard something today.”
Ears perked. “News?” Anna asked.
“Office gossip, dear,” her husband said. “The government’s talking about regulating the cyberbahn again.”
Hamo barked a short laugh. “It’s been – what? – six months since they tried it last, isn’t it?”
“They sound serious about it,” Rainer said, “this time.”
After their guests had gone home and Margot was in bed, Karin and Hamo headed into their own bedroom. “Hamo?” the red fox vixen asked.
They knew what was coming, and the cross-fox raised a paw. “I went to my old place.”
“Did your dress still fit?” their wife asked.
Hamo chuckled. “Amazingly, yes. I went to Attilas Höhle – “
“It’s still open?” They had met there.
“Same place, too. Believe me, I was surprised.” They finished undressing and laid down on the bed. “Had some Bliss.”
“Uh huh. And?”
“Spoke to a few people.”
She ed them on the bed, lying on her side with her head propped on one paw while the other gently caressed Hamo’s chest fur. “And?”
“Got fucked.”
Karin flicked an ear at the word. Fortunately, the baby monitor was set to listen in on their daughter, not for two-way communication. “A guy?”
“One of each.”
Both ears went up. “Must’ve been some strong Bliss, then.”
“It was, and I was wearing my mask,” Hamo itted. “Spent an hour at the clinic to make sure I’m clean – “
A sooty-furred finger tapped them on the tip of their nose. “You had better. Now, kiss me, you naughty, naughty fox.” Hamo complied, and when the two came up for air Karin added, “Thank you.”
“For?”
“Being honest.”
Hamo smiled up at her. “I promised you when we got married, love. I’ll always be honest with you.”
She drew a lazy pattern across the band of gray fur that ran down their throat to their crotch. “That’s good, and I love you for it.” She met her husband’s eyes. “But.”
“But?”
“But you had sex last night, and I didn’t.”
“Oh.”
“So,” Karin sidled closer, until she was nose to nose with Hamo, “you’re going to make me come twice before you go to sleep, and you don’t get any.” She grinned.
Hamo smiled. “The things I do for love,” and the two foxes started to chuckle.
***
“What the – what are you doing here?” Joachim asked the next morning as he entered the detective’s office.
“What’s it look like I’m doing?” Hamo asked. Their overcoat was hanging up nearby, and the cross-fox was bent over their computer.
“Here’s me thinking that you’d still be Downstairs,” the boar said as he hung up his own coat and went over to the coffee maker, “on a three-day bender. Want a cup?”
“Already have one,” Hamo replied, pointing at a half-empty cup. “And I can work fast if I want to. Met the current leaders of the Butterflies, and had a chat.”
“So,” Joachim spooned sugar into his coffee. “They at the back of this?”
“No. They’re just as mystified as we are. They pledged if I need it, and any information they find. Just finishing up my report.”
“Anything else?”
“Sent a couple inquiries out. One to the Education Ministry, about Gerstein. He was studying, and told his mother something was coming. Plus the ‘it comes’ thing we found in his apartment.”
“Think it could have been his exams?” The boar blew across his drink before sipping at it.
“Possible.”
“What was the other inquiry?”
Hamo’s lips quirked. “Ministry of Sex,” they said, giving the nickname for the part of the Health Ministry that ran the national brothel network. “I want to see why Gerstein didn’t work at a brothel.”
Ears perked as the office door opened again, with several furs coming in led by one with a loud and boisterous voice. “Who the hell’s that?” Joachim asked.
Hamo sighed and the cross-fox’s ears flattened as they replied, “Nunemacher, of course.” They regarded their now-empty cup. “I need more coffee.”
<NEXT>
<PREVIOUS>
<FIRST<
© 2021 by Walter Reimer
Thumbnail art by
Capt. Horatio Hortense Bezoar“Well! Look what the cat’s dragged in,” Karin said, grinning at her husband as Hamo entered their apartment. The table was set for dinner. “You’re home early,” she said after the two shared a kiss. “Any trouble?”
Hamo shook their head. “None whatever, and I stayed out of trouble.”
“Really?”
The cross-fox rolled their eyes. “I spent an hour at the clinic to make sure, darling.”
“Good,” the red fox said with mock severity. She then grinned and tousled her husband’s red-streaked gray headfur. “Margot’s out with Rainer and Anna and their kids for a play date, but they’ll be back in about an hour. Time for you to get cleaned up.”
“I took a shower this morning – “
“That was this morning, and you’re still in your work clothes. So get cleaned up for dinner. Shoo!”
Chuckling, Hamo said, “Yes, dear,” and headed for the bedroom.
By the time Margot shouted “Daddy!” and ran away from Anna to jump into her father’s paws, Hamo had taken their second shower and was now dressed in shorts and a t-shirt that bore a bizarre drawing of a World War tank with a legend in Fraktur that read Grinding My Gears.
The cross-fox scooped their giggling daughter up and Margot pointed at the shirt. “Tank!”
She giggled again as Hamo nuzzled the little vixen. “Yes, it’s a tank. Thanks, Anna, for you and Rainer taking her out for the day. Was she any trouble?” They nuzzled Margot again. “Were you any trouble, you naughty girl?” and the kit giggled again.
Anna and Rainer were both feline, with two children. Anna laughed and replied, “No, Hamo, she was a perfect angel all day – “
“That usually means she ran you both ragged,” Karin put in.
Rainer chuckled as he ran a paw over his son’s head. “Not as bad as Vanya here was, when he was two.” He raised his muzzle and sniffed. “That smells great.”
“Pizza,” Karin replied. “Would you two like to stay for dinner?”
“Oh, we wouldn’t want to impose – “
“Nonsense, there’s enough for everybody. Hamo?” Karin asked, and when they looked up at their wife she said, “Go get Margot ready for dinner.”
“Sure.” Rainer gathered up his two children, and the two fathers trooped off to the bathroom.
Anna insisted on helping reset the table. “Hamo does such a great job with Margot. Is it because - ?” Karin nodded, and the feline femme smiled.
By the time the two fathers had the children washed up and ready, Karin had taken the pizza from the oven, and the air was filled with the aroma of the meat and vegetables that the crust ed. The children had milk or soda, while Hamo opened a bottle of red wine for the adults.
There had been enough, just barely, and Anna helped Karin look after the children as Rainer and Hamo cleared the table. Afterwards, they chatted about the day as the children played in the middle of the living room floor.
Rainer took a sip of his wine. He was limiting himself to one, he’d said. Lowering the glass the gray tabby said, “Heard something today.”
Ears perked. “News?” Anna asked.
“Office gossip, dear,” her husband said. “The government’s talking about regulating the cyberbahn again.”
Hamo barked a short laugh. “It’s been – what? – six months since they tried it last, isn’t it?”
“They sound serious about it,” Rainer said, “this time.”
After their guests had gone home and Margot was in bed, Karin and Hamo headed into their own bedroom. “Hamo?” the red fox vixen asked.
They knew what was coming, and the cross-fox raised a paw. “I went to my old place.”
“Did your dress still fit?” their wife asked.
Hamo chuckled. “Amazingly, yes. I went to Attilas Höhle – “
“It’s still open?” They had met there.
“Same place, too. Believe me, I was surprised.” They finished undressing and laid down on the bed. “Had some Bliss.”
“Uh huh. And?”
“Spoke to a few people.”
She ed them on the bed, lying on her side with her head propped on one paw while the other gently caressed Hamo’s chest fur. “And?”
“Got fucked.”
Karin flicked an ear at the word. Fortunately, the baby monitor was set to listen in on their daughter, not for two-way communication. “A guy?”
“One of each.”
Both ears went up. “Must’ve been some strong Bliss, then.”
“It was, and I was wearing my mask,” Hamo itted. “Spent an hour at the clinic to make sure I’m clean – “
A sooty-furred finger tapped them on the tip of their nose. “You had better. Now, kiss me, you naughty, naughty fox.” Hamo complied, and when the two came up for air Karin added, “Thank you.”
“For?”
“Being honest.”
Hamo smiled up at her. “I promised you when we got married, love. I’ll always be honest with you.”
She drew a lazy pattern across the band of gray fur that ran down their throat to their crotch. “That’s good, and I love you for it.” She met her husband’s eyes. “But.”
“But?”
“But you had sex last night, and I didn’t.”
“Oh.”
“So,” Karin sidled closer, until she was nose to nose with Hamo, “you’re going to make me come twice before you go to sleep, and you don’t get any.” She grinned.
Hamo smiled. “The things I do for love,” and the two foxes started to chuckle.
***
“What the – what are you doing here?” Joachim asked the next morning as he entered the detective’s office.
“What’s it look like I’m doing?” Hamo asked. Their overcoat was hanging up nearby, and the cross-fox was bent over their computer.
“Here’s me thinking that you’d still be Downstairs,” the boar said as he hung up his own coat and went over to the coffee maker, “on a three-day bender. Want a cup?”
“Already have one,” Hamo replied, pointing at a half-empty cup. “And I can work fast if I want to. Met the current leaders of the Butterflies, and had a chat.”
“So,” Joachim spooned sugar into his coffee. “They at the back of this?”
“No. They’re just as mystified as we are. They pledged if I need it, and any information they find. Just finishing up my report.”
“Anything else?”
“Sent a couple inquiries out. One to the Education Ministry, about Gerstein. He was studying, and told his mother something was coming. Plus the ‘it comes’ thing we found in his apartment.”
“Think it could have been his exams?” The boar blew across his drink before sipping at it.
“Possible.”
“What was the other inquiry?”
Hamo’s lips quirked. “Ministry of Sex,” they said, giving the nickname for the part of the Health Ministry that ran the national brothel network. “I want to see why Gerstein didn’t work at a brothel.”
Ears perked as the office door opened again, with several furs coming in led by one with a loud and boisterous voice. “Who the hell’s that?” Joachim asked.
Hamo sighed and the cross-fox’s ears flattened as they replied, “Nunemacher, of course.” They regarded their now-empty cup. “I need more coffee.”
<NEXT>
<PREVIOUS>
<FIRST<
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We'll see who this new player is.....next episode!!
We will!
